Instagram Influence My life seems attractive – but I was alone.

Growing up on a cotton field in South Texas, Jesse Dupry, 39, one day sat in front of international airport scenes, slept in a five-star Paris hotel conference hall, and never imagined she would be approached by a lover. The best fashion designers, they all wanted you to wear their clothes.

She was a well-known fashion designer with over 700,000 followers. . . . But outside the camera, she pushed her husband and was sitting alone on the couch reading a self-help book in sweatpants. She has days to divorce, not knowing who to trust and thinking that her wealth, fame, and free clothes are worthless.

“It was around the fourth of July. My husband Grant left home. So I realized that I would end up with millions of followers alone, but no one would give up, ”Dupry told the Post. Today she and Grant live in Los Angeles with their 3-year-old daughter, June. Her new book, “Self-Pursuing Self-Influence of the Influencer Journey from Self-Suspicion,” has many of these and other stories that seem perfect on Instagram, but with many cracks.

Duprie never set out to be an influence. After graduating with a degree in Communications from Chicago University, she worked in television production. Her “Opera Winfrey Show” and E! Her co-workers always praise her fashion sense. Her friends pushed her to start a blog in her late twenties, which later became Damsel In Dior. “I never thought it would be a full-time business,” Dupper recalls. “I found something I really enjoyed, something I loved very much and wanted to hear.” The blog’s interests worked well in her ability to focus on her interests, and she later realized that they were part of the symptoms associated with the AEDD test. I would go to the laptop before brushing my teeth. I’ll be in bed with the laptop. I was just too busy. ”

But as the blog expanded into an Instagram account and made six-digit promotion deals with brands such as Amazon, Cotton Inc., eBay and Old Navy, cracks began to appear in Dupry’s image. It was a $ 60,000 tax bill. And, because Dupry was considered to have arrived and arrived at the time, she found it difficult to bring free goods from brands. She has to spend money on clothes and accessories in order to make money by swindling people who buy affiliate links posted on her blog. At that time, Dupper discovered the art of “dragging”: go into a clothing store and borrow what you want, pay a 10% recovery fee, and return the rest of the items. That way, $ 2,000 was reduced to $ 200.

These marketing strategies have been strengthened by strengthening relationships with fashion advertisers. Duprie meets with fashion promoters and is invited to choose clothes. While it looked attractive, Duprie said it was hard work. A meeting with the advertiser will be followed by a handwritten note (personal details will be distributed, Dupry contains a diary about each advertiser’s family, likes, dislikes and hobbies). As soon as she finished washing and drying her clothes, she returned with the chosen gift.

She often worked all night, analyzing analytics, attending blog conferences, and streamlining her photo editing skills. She negotiates a contract. It was not easy to be the editor, star, producer, technology support and administrative assistant of her seven-digit empire, but she felt she could not accept it during her lifetime. Looked Picture-perfect. “I am very happy to say this, but the first trip to Italy is once, twice, three times, four times. It’s still amazing. It still makes you feel that way, but you quickly realize that you are on a flight alone. ”

Her job was also to hide her inner pain. During Dupry’s childhood, the family went bankrupt and Dupry often had to help her father, sometimes driving her to a bar when she was still a teenager. Her father was drunk at graduation, and there was a flash of anger that frightened her, including the burning of their lawn.

Deep, Dupry knows that her turbulent childhood is creating waves in her life with Grant. As her brand grew, so did her husband’s attention. But instead of digging in, Duperie turned on the filters. “The way my mind works,” she says, “I begin to hold on to things that I feel I can control when things go wrong.” “It’s content I created for me.”

Meanwhile, in Dior she Damsel Blogging has never been more successful. And the more successful she was, the more spectators waited for her to fall. Damsel in Dior has appeared in various online forums designed to identify influencers.

“It’s easy to make fun of girls who complain about being on the beach,” says Dupry. “Really? Well, we feel sorry for you. ‘ I totally got it. Alas, when I think about it, it goes back within myself. But if you are not armed and you do not have the tools to properly process and resist that, it will take some time to get used to and grow that thick skin, ”says Dupry. The forums are no longer. “Actually, a lot of trolls come in your comments or DMS, which is amazing. I prefer it. I said, “Let’s go and have lunch. Tell me all about how much you hate me. ”

But sometimes enemies are not just strangers. One year, Ashley, one of Dupry’s friends and bridesmaids, was attending New York Fashion Week, working as a TV presenter for several years and trying to promote her own blog. Dupry, who was at Fashion Week, continued to delay her calls – until Ashley announced that she had bought a leopard print dress from Australian designer Zimmerman. The dress was the same as the one sent by Dupry; She planned to dress herself for the show.

Disappointed by Ashley’s twin chances, Dupry changed her dressing plan and drove her out of the show, annoyed by Ashley’s quest for success.

Later, Duprie realized that this was a mistake – and the event was a turning point. She found herself screaming at her assistant; During professional meetings, and without speaking to her husband, unless this is the case. I think the blog, about me and my Instagram has been boiled down to this point. It was just so selfish, so, so, so selfish. And these times increase. And if you keep adding them, you will be stoned.

Rock bottom means wrestling with the question: Who would have been if Dessie hadn’t been Damsel in Dior? Over the weekend, her husband left home, Dupry was determined to heal herself. She and Grant started attending couples’ therapy. Gradually, she began to feel more and more anxious.

Today, Dupree is trying to make her life more real – and offline. Instead of posting immediately, she usually takes a day or two to undo. “It’s really about quality, more than quantity. “And it shortens our lives a little bit.”