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HHollywood has the Oscars, literature has the Booker Prize, and sport has the BBC Sports Personality of the Year. But the business world is less likely to recognize the luminaries’ achievements (beyond boring business awards or the occasional criminal trial). So every year the Observer Business Agenda column sets out to right that wrong. Here are our awards for the 2022 Titans of Industry.
Matt Hancock Award for Public Service
Millions of Britons expressed their gratitude to those who went the extra mile in public service during the early days of the Corona virus epidemic. A company linked to Conservative peer Michel Monet traveled an extra 5,000 miles to China to source protective equipment for the NHS.
Of course, the Lady Moon Awards are little more than a weekly round of applause for key employees. Documents reported by Guard In November it revealed she and her children received £29m in profits from the PPE company.
Monet has taken a “leave of absence” from the master’s house to clear her name in an as-yet-undisclosed manner, so she won’t be able to make it to the awards ceremony. But if she does, she may use her speech to thank her husband, Douglas Barrowman, who played a key role in PPE Medpro, and their attorneys, who will surely be grateful for the permanent record of their dedicated work. On behalf of their customers.
Bonnie and Clyde Award for Best Couple
The business world has had its fair share of star-crossed lovers, but few of those romances ended in what prosecutors called “one of the largest financial frauds in American history.”
Technically, Sam Bankman-Fried and Caroline Ellison were reportedly not dating back in November when crypto exchange FTX crashed dramatically. They were definitely involved financially. The tight ties between Bankman-Fried FTX, where Ellison was CEO, and fellow hedge fund Alameda Research are now the focus of scrutiny by prosecutors.
Bankman-Fried was taken into custody by Bahamian authorities this month. Ellison has agreed to plead guilty to seven counts of wire fraud, securities fraud and money laundering (with a maximum sentence of 110 years) and is cooperating with investigators. There was never a worse woe, etc. story.
The Andy Warhol Award for Politics
Forget your 15 minutes of fame. In the autumn, the Conservative Party appeared to be offering 15 minutes to someone who wanted to run the economy.
To be fair to Kwasi Kwarteng, he managed quite a bit of that: he was Chancellor for 38 days (more than a century in the UK Treasury’s shortest reign in office).
Kwarteng nearly triggered a financial crisis in a matter of weeks, and deservedly so. But there was another strong challenge from the same office: Nadim Zehawi. He made a surprise bid to become chancellor for two days, after accepting the job he told the man who hired him, Boris Johnson, to quit the next day. However, they were fired before Johnson could fire Zahawi, who somehow managed to stay for 63 days.
Presidents Club Memorial Award
Sexism is still a big problem in the British business world – but sometimes it can be hard to understand the prevailing sentiment. So congratulations on showing the world at Aviva’s annual meeting that bullying of individual shareholders is alive, well and just as moronic as ever. One investor, apparently belonging to the Richard Keyes school of feminist psychology, told the meeting that CEO Amanda Blank should come back “with pants on.”
Highly recommended: Don’t blame it all on individual investors. Only nine CEOs of the FTSE 100 are female, so boardrooms still haven’t gotten the memo that it will be 2023 soon.
The Golden Monopoly board
This gong goes to the most impressive rental of the year. As usual, there are extra points if the products are essential to human life, so there was only one winner in 2022: the entire energy industry.
Russia’s invasion of Ukraine has caused prices to skyrocket everywhere. Big oil, renewables and nuclear have all made what Vladimir Putin might describe as “murder.”
Oil and gas bosses in the sector have been widely praised for their good fortune, but one standout was Linda Cook, chief executive of the North Sea’s biggest operator, Harbor Energy. She landed a £4.6m “golden peace” as part of a £6m pay package. Cook is a master of this art. In 2010, she received a “golden salute” worth more than $30 million as a consolation prize for losing her top job at Shell.
Most praised: Bulb Energy boss Hayden Wood, who continued to receive a £250,000 taxpayer-funded salary for months after his company collapsed in a £6.5bn government bailout. Good job if you can.
Free speech award
We admire Elon Musk’s commitment to “speak perfection” that lasted until he fired half his company’s employees.
Musk has made a big deal of Twitter’s inconsistent moderation policies (some of which are verified). However, that hasn’t stopped him from creating his own inconsistencies, including banning Twitter accounts that: private jet tracking public information; Journalists who post links to other sources for that information; Competing social media companies; People who post links to other social media companies. The public square is now more derelict.
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