A late-to-the-game tech CEO is only left with bananas, toilet paper, or horse ranches to revolutionize.

SAN FRANCISCO—Grieving his poor timing to enter a saturated industry, a late-to-the-game tech executive complained Wednesday that aside from bananas, toilet paper and horse breeding, he has nothing left to revolutionize. “Oh jeez, I wanted to screw something up too, but there’s only three things left!” Tech entrepreneur and johnny-lately Howard Perkins, citing recent market analysis that confirms every sector of the economy has been transformed by technology companies in a way that drives revenue to Silicon Valley. “Advertising, retail, entertainment, transportation, lodging — it’s all done. Except for the toilet paper, it’s boring. And horse breeding – I don’t know anything about it, but maybe we could build some sort of online pony breeding platform? Oh, we can never make it scalable. Well, I guess I should start pitching investors on the exciting things happening in the banana space now. During the press conference, Perkins confirmed that the banana-sharing app had given him $25 million in seed funding to develop the idea.